Early Season Review: 24, Episodes 1-4 (NO SPOILERS)

After 7 months of waiting, the first two installments of Fox’s hit series “24” will finally be released to the world tonight. Due to my devastating good looks and personality, I have already made connections rather high up in Hollywood, and have secured the first four episodes of the thrilling action series.

Led by Jack Bauer and our friends at the Los Angeles CTU (Counter-Terrorist Unit) must again fight our Middle-Eastern pals who find it more important to destroy all of America rather than to lead meaningful and happy lives. We find out through the previews that Jack has been exchanged back to the United States by the Republic of China. Terrorists who have taken the country under a siege of suicide bombing attacks are demanding Jack be sacrificed in order to obtain critical information to stop the attacks.

I will not give away any details to the shows. Normally, it really wouldn’t matter because 24 has become so formulaic that you could predict everything from the start. For instance, let’s recap some of the formula:

• Jack returns from some type of hiatus in which he must overcome physical, mental, and personal issues in order to perform his job,
• CTU will have an insider and get compromised, often due to the fact that it is protected by mall security,
• A foul-smelling love plot will permeate early on in the season and fester the entire time throughout,
• It only takes 15 minutes to drive ANYWHERE in Los Angeles county (this is even more ridiculous now that I live here),
• CTU will have a high-ranking female individual who is a weak and embarrassing leader, but will also be rather pleasing to the eye,
• Someone from “Division” will come to replace CTU due to their incompetence, but will only bring more incompetence,
• A civilian family will be brought into the mix and have some sort of tremendous impact,
• Jack will go crazy and stop following protocol (often with a quality interrogation scene or two),
• The Nation’s leaders won’t listen to Jack because he’s gone crazy, only to realize he was right when it’s too late,
• All blonde-haired characters will be indestructible (Jack, Chloe, Audrey, Kim), while brunettes deal with a much higher mortality rate,
• Someone dies in the CTU hospital room,
• Jack will scream “DAMNIT!” and it will be awesome.

I’m not complaining though, because the formula is a good one, the action is great, and Kiefer Sutherland is incredible. It’s post-911 action/drama and I love it.

Moving on to this season, you can already tell that you will see some of the above formulaic traits. However, I’ll tell you this – this is NOT going to be your typical 24 season. If you think the show jumped the shark after its outlandish 5th season, then come on back aboard, because this one looks intense, and above all else, different.

Jack is different, as he’s been through a lot in China. The leadership is different, having learned from old mistakes and having a new President. The enemy is different, because there are multiple fronts. And finally, Chloe is different – she just looks hotter and is losing her charismatic attitude.

You will see things that have not happened in previous 24s. You will see Jack do things that he’s never done, and things done to Jack that haven’t been done before (i.e. he actually doesn’t beat the ever-living shit out of someone in one altercation, but don’t worry, that person will still die).

These new twists, along with others, make 24 extremely promising. Watch the first four episodes and tell me you aren’t absolutely hooked. Because I am, and now I have to wait a month to see any more.

Enjoy, and Rest In Peace Edgar (Seasons 2-5, pictured above) -berto